trapped in the chamber of horrors

Trapped in the Chamber of Horrors

I’m giving up
the ghost
turning in
my badge
making a
clean sweep
of it:
over the
years I’ve
turned in
the names of
7,436 people.

It started
when I
was young
three I
but I
might have
been a
little older.
Or younger
even maybe
I started
paying attention
at an
early age
& I
saw right
off that
things weren’t

What am
I saying?

I didn’t
turn in
any names.

But that’s
what I
would have
done if
there’d been
someone to
turn them
in to.

Instead I
logged them
away in
my head.

But so
many wrong
stuffed away
in your
head turn
generic with
time &
the names
attached to
fade away.

They become
secrets &
then you
begin to
feel that
keeping so
many secrets
is wrong
& you
add your
own name
to the

these guys
know about
the toxicity
of secrets,
take it
from someone
who’s been
trapped in
the chamber
of horrors
since before he
could walk.

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