Category Archives: shards

a new beginning

A New Beginning

What’s the difference between inspiration and insight? A fighter jet and a hawk? Abundance and gluttony? The well-phrased declaration and a flat-out lie? A pistol and a whip? Pistol whipped and flayed? Flamboyance and gaudy attire? Equal rights and equanimity? A door prize, a door jamb, toe jam and a tight spot? Dancing for money, dancing for love, dancing to avoid being pistol whipped?

Who says we’re all connected? The Buddha who grew up in a castle? Christ who took the rap for the common man? Tom Hanks on a movie set? The executioner with his ax and a sack full of heads?

Okay, here’s the deal. Step into the huddle. These are your teammates, they want you to carry the ball. Are you up for it? Do you want to be the center of the enemy’s attention? Or would you rather intercept passes?

What’s the difference between consequence and destiny? Whip out your abacus, move the beads around, it’s no different from chopsticks. Slurp up the noodles and sip the green tea, pretend you know what you’re doing. What happens when time stands still, who comes to the rescue?

What’s the difference between a plastic bag in a high wind and a Ford Taurus in a tornado? No difference. Escalation, the great equalizer.

Capitulate, surrender, throw in the towel, abandon ship, forget the women and children, the captain up in the wheelhouse. Swim the wild ocean until you’re marooned on an island. Don’t plant a flag. Lie naked on the white sand of destiny, then stand upright and husk a coconut. Don’t question how you got a machete, don’t mourn the people hacked to pieces by machetes in Uganda and the Philippines.

Think of this as a new beginning.

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amargeddon

Armageddon

The wind howls, darkness sets in, rodents rise out of slumber. Horses stampede. The uprising has begun.

The sky rains pellets with the bad smell of revenge. Gravity’s lost its grip. Your wrist has no pulse.

The jets spin like gnats in the firmament. Populations migrate to the sea.

Large-scale repentance, snake oil and cremation. Offerings of stale bread and fish.

The rooster crows and the spider glides down its web.

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the roof caved in

The Roof Caved In

The roof caved in. The top of my skull sank into my brain, disrupting who knows what.

There are those who think they have a pretty good idea what. They’ve done studies. They’ve produced images of the brain, some of them three-dimensional, using all sorts of imaging devices. And they’ve sliced up the brains of dead people and studied them. Little by little they’ve come to understand the brain, these people, but like with the universe itself, there’s still a long way to go.

Nevertheless, what’s been observed has been used to establish medical procedures and has helped keep law and order by deciding who should go to prison and who should get electrocuted. Who should be put on a nut ward and who should be set free.

What we have here is the brain studying the brain.

Just how much about itself do you think the brain is willing to reveal?

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germs

Germs

There were germs in the pantry. Germs on the unwrapped rolls of toilet paper and in the crevices between his teeth. Germs on the yellow film of his coffee cup and tucked under the rim of the kitchen counter. He had more important things to tend to, but he couldn’t get his mind off the germs.

Did this make him a hypochondriac? Did it make him ineligible for happiness? Was it too late to say to hell with germs and go barefoot in germ-infested beach sand?

Surely then he would be more attractive. Surely then some woman would lower her eyes and draw circles in the sand with her toe. So much to consider, and all the while his skin crawled with germs.

How to get started. Should he throw out the bleach and ammonia, the Ajax and his scrubbing pads? Stop bathing three times a day and changing his underwear and socks each time? Would this send a signal that he was ready for love?

He ripped off his clothes. He showered and then sank into a tub of hot water and then showered again. He toweled off and got into bed naked, the sheets crisp and smelling of soap. He pulled the top sheet up to his chin and lay still.

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dancing the night away

Dancing the Night Away

Thirty years ago at the first Cornerstone memorial I jumped up on stage at the Ranch Tavern while Lucky Pierre was playing, ripped off my t-shirt, and set it on fire.

The music stopped and two big guys yanked me off stage and threw me out the door into a 10-below snowy night.

This was two weeks after Cowboy Bob and I had smuggled about fifty snowballs into the Ranch and started a full-blown snowball fight, and my welcome was wearing thin. The owner came out to give me my coat so I wouldn’t freeze to death, and after a short heart-to-heart he let me back in.

This past Saturday some local musicians from that era got together and, calling themselves The Sons of 51, played a gig at a downtown restaurant. I strolled in wearing my Greasewood City Ramblers t-shirt with the vague notion of repeating the t-shirt ritual, but if I’d failed to get the message across thirty years earlier, I certainly wasn’t going to succeed now–the place was packed with well-dressed, gray-haired, stable people who since the Ranch burned down (I had nothing to do with it) had had a career and raised a family. Setting my t-shirt on fire in that atmosphere wouldn’t result in a heart-to-heart with the owner out in the parking lot, it would result in my arrest and having my name put on a pyromaniac’s watch list.

So, I kept my shirt on and danced. I danced until I was glistening with sweat, and when the whole thing shut down at the preposterously early hour of 11:30, I walked home, stripped down, and holding my t-shirt over the kitchen sink in the dark, set it on fire.

“Come on baby, let the good times roll,” I whispered to my reflection, wavering in orange flames in the glass of the window.

Then the fire went out and there was only darkness and the smell of the ashes of a time long gone.

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heads up

Heads Up

The Losers put their heads together and sat down at the drawing board. They argued, the heads. It’s the first time the Losers realized how many heads they have. It probably has something to do with why they’re Losers: people tend to be prejudice against someone with many heads – too many lips flapping, too many eyes darting from side to side, and when the heads laugh, it’s like a cage full of hyenas going off. It’s hard to stay rational when faced with so many heads protruding out of one neck.

Losers claim the deck was stacked. Telling them this isn’t a card game does no good–with their eyes shut tight, they furiously shake all their heads.

It’s time for armed intervention, which does not bode well for the Losers. Winners have more arms with greedy fingers than Losers have heads, and they start in slapping the Losers’ heads around.

Over time the Losers continue to grow heads until they’re no longer considered human by the Winners, they’re seen as monsters and are locked in dark cellars or hung from tree limbs with warning signs stapled to their heads.

The Winners grow uneasy as the flow of Losers increases exponentially. Exponential to what no one knows, but it’s best not to question such things if you don’t want to become a Loser.

A Rehabilitation Program got established, not to save Losers but to neutralize them. Some are given low-level government jobs. Others are put on submarines and sent under the polar ice. A few are shot into space and left there. The ones with the most heads are put in carnival side shows and given trailers to live in. Their families are brought back from exile and appear with the Losers on TV.

Stand-up comedians start making jokes about getting ahead in life, and they are banished from the World of Winners into the World of Losers where they are treated like freaks because they have only one head.

Two generations down the line, it’s as if things have always been this way, and run-of-the-mill Winners bow before the Rehabilitation Program, the portal into the World of Losers.

Nothing worse can happen to you than to be banished there.

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